Singapore City Sidewalk Rules (Part 2)

After my first part of Singapore’s Sidewalk Rules I continue here with three more things AngryAngMo gets really angry about, when trying to get his Kopi just downstairs, fighting the Sidewalk war to survive the urban jungle. I don’t know why and how, but more and more people seem to have totally lost their complete sense of coordination, politeness and common understanding of how to behave in a moving crowd!

Crossing My Way – Blindfolded

First I thought “WOW, I entered Singapore and not only lost my total rights of privacy, no I also got invisible!” Well, turns out, I didn’t, at least not the invincible part. Instead I realized that either me, being the original German I am, am much to structured and organized (yes, I hear that all the time!), or the people around me are simply without any coordination at all (yes, I say that all the time!).

After witnessing several minor severe Bicycle and Skating accidents (not the self caused ones but the head-to-head-crash ones) at ECP within 2 minutes and escaping the deadly cage of my friends car after the first 10 meters, I thought it maybe might not be me. Maybe. (The 5 Best Places For Inline Skating In Singapore)

So now when I walk to my office in the morning and I see a “Curved Business Lady” (as the curved soccer ball) coming my way, I know even though she still goes straight (on that wide and empty sidewalk) she will DEFINITELY turn into my direction like me being a magnet and cross my way right in front of my feet without even blinking.

And bringing the invisible point into play again, no, she wont stop, hesitate or slow down at the moment of the possible impact, she will go straight, even though she is crossing my way, as I said, not even blinking once…

Mmmh, Because We All Like Puke On Our Shoes

Have you ever crossed Clarke Quay, any club’s dance floor or your HDB deck far after midnight and wondered about that sour smell and the improved stickiness of your shoes. (5 Bad Things Of Living In An HDB)

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Related Pictures (Click To Enlarge)

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‘)); ?> Welcome to “I-Puke-On-The-Sidewalk-World”. I mean really, it’s Ok if you have fun, drink, drink more.. and more.. and then puke, but please not right in the middle of the sidewalk. And your happy little friends, holding you half drunken themselves, wont make me smile either. No, its not funny and I don’t feel like laughing, I just stepped into your lunch, and I don’t like it!!

So find yourself a toilet bowl or some bush or tree, or just wait until you reach home, puke in your bed and then fall asleep. I guarantee you the next time you will be very watchful where you lay your last meal to rest (at least I was after doing so).

Pah, Because I Like You I Spit On You

Compared to Europe the whole “Spitting-Situation” in Singapore is really not that bad. In my hometown I felt like a little soldier trying not to get hit by the spitting-bombs, here however, clean sidewalks.

But totally the opposite to Europe, where everyone around would kill you on the spot for doing so, here that nasty sound of accumulating the last three day’s left over snot in your mouth can be heard everywhere. Yes, especially during lunch time I appreciate it a lot. Makes me puke and safe some Dollars from the now-not-purchased food.

So every now and then you actually see people spitting around, but then its not that little spit next to the sidewalk, its that ugly yellow blob thingy dripping right in front of your feet. Hehe, I like how I feel sick now after writing that.

I am out. Watch out where you go!

Read The First Part Here

If you want to learn more about Singapore’s Sidewalk Rules and Wars, read my first post on the dangerous zone HERE (Singapore Sidewalk Rules Part 1)


One Comment


Spot on! The “crossing right in front of my feet” ritual used to drive me nuts.

And don’t forget the Singaporean Rule No.1, which is Avoid Eye Contact At Any Cost!
Simon Pegg’s “Shaun of the Dead” movie pales by comparison.

Keep up the good work.

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